Budapest - A reminder in gratitude.
Last night I slept on a boat hotel on the river Danube in Budapest and what transpired over the next 24 hours has certainly given me a lot to consider on life, habits and how truly grateful are we?
I was with my family on the way to our brother Johns’ wedding in Romania. My sister Bella, her two girls and I had stayed since Monday for a couple of relaxing days exploring the city.
Being from a boating family we thought this ‘boat hotel’ would be a nice novelty to re-visit, as we stayed there for the first time years ago.
We had a lovely afternoon on the boat, my sister Fionnuala and family ate and rested before they took the overnight train—the rest of us to take the train this morning—on which I now am eagerly writing this! And so it was one of those nice family get togethers the first of many to come over the week.
At around 10pm we were saying goodnight and making our way to our cabins. Just before we went to bed we noticed a lot of blue lights and sirens about 100 metres along the river from us.
We couldn’t see much as it was pouring rain and we were preoccupied getting everyone sorted, so we didn’t take that much notice and assumed it was a car accident—we went to bed, excited for the next leg of the trip and finally arriving in Banpotoc to celebrate the wedding of John and his fiancé Andreea.
As the morning rose we were confronted by tragic news that those blue lights and sirens were for a river accident. A boat carrying 35 people; 33 tourists and their guides from Korea and two Hungarian crew members had been hit by a bigger cruise boat and capsized. Seven survivors, seven confirmed dead on the scene and twenty one missing at the time I write this.
My initial reaction was “It could have been us!” We had six children between the ages of 3 and fifteen with us, and my parents and aunt and uncle are all well over 70. There would be no hope for their survival and I am literally welling up as I write this because the Korean families aboard that boat are no different to us. The youngest child on the boat was six, she is amongst those missing. Words cannot describe the agony the surviving Korean families must be going through today and those back home hearing the news. My heart is with them and we are all very shook by the closeness of it all.
As we absorbed this sombre news we slowly made our way to the train, taking us from Budapest to Simeria—now sitting on the train—as I continue to write, with this morning’s news and what I’m about to share with you—really does put everything into perspective—on the things in life the majority of us take for granted.
You see on our way to the train—little things we take for granted every day started testing our patience. I couldn’t buy a coffee unless I withdrew HUF cash at the station. There were certainly no trendy Pret’s or Costa Coffees laden with gluten free goodies, protein shakes and oat milk flat whites to go, that you could pay with a touch of your smartphone. There were about two benches that we could see in the whole train station. We eventually found a little cafe where we all piled into with our numerous suitcases, ordering coffee and croissants that Dad spent the last of his HUF’s on.
If I had known that we were about to sit on a train with no dining car or cafe for 8 hours then I think I would have been more proactive about finding a cash machine, to get a few more of those tiny coffees into me! I am definitely someone who needs my caffeine hit, or two, every morning. I did manage to find a little shop that accepts cards and I bought several snacks for everyone as I usually do for journeys. They were meant to be just that - snacks, presuming we could buy lunch on the train. Silly, silly me!
All in all I should be in a bad mood. Strike that, a really bad mood. I am a person of habit and ever since boarding school I thrive on it. Quite frankly I was a little ‘narky’ at first when the full reality of the journey lay ahead. And the hour we spent going through the Hungarian and Romanian passport control again tested my patience.
Being a personal trainer and wellness coach I try to live by example. I keep regular meal times, bed times and I exercise in some description at least 5 times a week. I live by the 80/20 rule when it comes to all things health and fitness. I used to have serious body image hang ups and was a bit fanatical about fitness—to put it mildly!—but these days I’m happy to say I’ve found a sweet spot in both my diet and training.
It’s taken me awhile to get to the point but given the morning I’ve had, the idea of us arguing over whether intermittent fasting is the thing, what snacks are healthiest blah blah blah is even less attractive than I usually find it.
The majority of humans on this planet would be thankful to have access to the food scraps in our kitchen bins, while we waste without thought. This reminds me of a man we encountered on the street on Tuesday here in Budapest. He was merrily whistling “Somethin’ Stupid” by Frank Sinatra whilst strolling between street bins, inspecting them and eating or drinking anything he could find in them. He drank a quarter filled Starbucks iced tea he’d found whilst we watched in shock.
The thing is he didn’t look any more or less depressed than the average London commuter at rush hour!
In Western society most of us truly live a life of excess without regard to the other less fortunate. We spend far more time worrying about our social media likes than the state of our heads and hearts or indeed our bodies. We say we are too tired to train but we stay up late eating snacks and watching tv, whilst checking emails and scrolling through IG. Making our bodies infinitely more lethargic and lacking in energy than a good training session would.
This morning, when I heard of the tragedy which unfolded last night, to which we were oblivious in our warm beds only 100 metres away, my first thought was that I was never staying on a moored river boat hotel again.
But then, of course, that’s missing the lesson here.
The thing is that tragedy can strike any of us, at any time. As my sister said; “it’s just about being in the wrong place at the wrong time”. I am not meaning to sound like I’m on a downer here, or to be negative, but rather if any good can come from a tragedy like this, then let it be a reminder for us to count our blessings instead of our bad luck and to live with as much joy and happiness in our hearts that we can muster.
Every day that we even have a body to worry about and feed is a day more than those poor souls who died last night on the river Danube. We are not safer walking down a street in London any more than sleeping on a river boat in Budapest. We are not safer praying in a mosque in Churchtown than we are in a five star hotel in Sri Lanka.
Today I am reminded of the virtues of patience, courage, humility, resourcefulness, reason, justice and creativity. I could do with practising them more myself and as I make this journey today I think about how I can apply this in my own life.
One of the foundations for living life to the fullest, in as healthy a way as possible is developing good habits—and that is what the next blog will be about!
For now I would recommend reading “Atomic Habits” by James Clear. It has helped me so much in gaining more control over my life and managing my time.
“If you want better results, then forget about setting goals. Focus on your system instead”.
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